When Having a Trauma-Informed Doctor Is a Matter of Life and Death
There I sat, in a small room, and in walked you, the doctor. I’d shown up to the ER because I was having a mental health crisis.
Read MoreThe Simple Question a Crisis Worker Asked Me That Helped Calm My Panic Attack
My thoughts come at me too quickly, too loudly — it’s as if my mind is shouting. At the same time, my heart is racing and I find it difficult to breathe. I grip onto the kitchen counter to stop myself from falling over.I am no stranger to panic attacks, so I know what is happening, but this time, it feels different. I cannot see an end in sight, which is what prompts me to remember that I need help.
Read MoreI Tried rTMS and This is What Happened
Repetitive Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation or rTMS for short, has been around for quite a while. It is a mental health treatment that was developed in 1985. It hasn’t entered into mainstream practice in a lot of places just yet, but it is gaining popularity. Up until 2 years ago, I hadn’t heard of it either.
Read MoreIt Turns Out Mind-Body Connection Isn't All Just Nonsense.
I have lived most of my life thinking that deep breathing (and all its cousins) were something people had, collectively agreed to B.S. about. Not because they were being malicious, but due to some sort of worldwide agreed-upon fiction.
Read MoreThis is Me, I Am Triggered
Time stops.
My mind is now its’ own universe, everything else is foggy and distant. I feel too many emotions at once. They jumble around, bouncing off each other, competing for the top spot. I’m angry, sad, frightened, ashamed, and confused. I am in the danger of the past. My breathing is slow, almost imperceptible. My chest is tight and I’m running out of air. I feel trapped in place, unable to move. All reminiscent of back then.
Read MoreThis Different Way of Seeing My C-PTSD Flight Response Blew My Mind
I opened my eyes and the first thought that popped in my head was: “I do not want to get out of bed.” The classic morning refrain for us countless many. After 40 minutes of arguing with myself, I pushed my way toward my coffee pot. I then dragged out my yoga gear and propped open my computer. “Time for Zoom class,” I dutifully told myself, as I then clicked “join meeting.”
Read MoreHow This ‘Ted Lasso’ Theme Relates to My Complex PTSD Healing Journey
“Ted Lasso” is not a TV show that I would have chosen to watch on my own. In fact, until it was recommended to me, I somehow hadn’t even heard of it. It’s the stuff of delicious irony that I know myself well enough to recognize that even if I had come across this series, I can guess that I would have seen what looks like a goofy sports comedy and said, “pass.” I would have missed out. You see, “Ted Lasso” isn’t really about sports and while it’s certainly silly at times, it’s equally thoughtful.
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